In Your Heart of Hearts

The last two weeks we’ve thought about various levels of identity. This week is a sort of an application of what we’ve talked about.

We’ve all heard throughout our lives phrases like “Home is where the heart is” and “You are what you eat”. Both of these sayings allude to the idea that regardless of actual location in space and time, much of who we are resides in our heart. What we think about, what are goals are, who we care about and who we don’t, these are all things that are within our heart. These can be fairly obviously manifested in our actions.

But then there is our heart of hearts. This goes even deeper. This is where our motives lie. Our unrealized desires, the image of what we ultimately want to become, even if we are physically, mentally, or emotionally unable to attain it. This is often the most secret part of our identity. And it turns out, when it comes to the Savior, it is there in our Heart of Hearts that most defines our relationship to Him.

To illustrate this point, I want to briefly explain chapters 3 and 4 in the Gospel of John. These chapters talk about Jesus’ interaction with Nicodemus and the Woman at the Well.

First off, who is Nicodemus? Nicodemus is a Pharisee, and a ruler of the Jews. Pharisees were known for being extremely literal and strict in living the Law of Moses. They spent their days among the people, trying to enforce the rules and giving harsh punishments to those who broke any of the rules. He was a man, he was probably wealthy, and was seen as a leader. He would have been very prominent in the city.

In John chapter 3, Nicodemus comes to visit Jesus in the dead of night. He tells Jesus that he knows Jesus is sent from God, because no one else could possibly perform the miracles Jesus performed unless they were from God. Jesus (I imagine him smiling knowingly) told him that it was true, and that “except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.” Nicodemus is very confused at that point, and asked Jesus how on earth could he possibly re-enter his mother as a grown man?! Jesus then explains the symbolism of baptism as a rebirth, and how we can feel the influence of the Spirit. Even though we can’t see the Spirit, its actions are as detectable as when the wind blows.

Let’s look at chapter 4 and then compare. Chapter 4 is about the Woman at the Well.

So who is she? The Woman is a Samaritan. Jews (considered at this time to be “God’s People”) hated the Samaritans and treated them unkindly. Likewise the Samaritans didn’t like the Jews, due to the treatment they received from them. She was, obviously, a woman. Women didn’t hold much power or authority in those days. Moreover, this Woman was a sinner. She had had five husbands and was living with a sixth man that she was not married to. The Woman came to the well at midday, plausibly the best time of day to go and be there alone. She was undoubtedly an outcast, even amongst her outcast people.

Jesus came to the well and found the Woman there. He approached her and talked to her. At first she was on guard. Jesus was a Jewish man, and she was a Samaritan woman. I’m sure she expected to be mistreated. Jesus beings to tell her about the living water that he could give her, in place of her water from the well. He was really telling her that he could offer her eternal life if she would follow his teachings. Little by little, her heart was opened and she began to understand that this was no ordinary man. He told her that he knew of her past and current sins of adultery, but he did not condemn her for it. After their discussion, the Woman told Jesus that she had heard of the coming of a Messiah and asked him if he were this Messiah. Jesus confirmed it and the Woman immediately went to look for as many people to listen to him as possible.

What is the difference in the relationship between Jesus and Nicodemus and between Jesus and the Woman at the Well?

Nicodemus came to Jesus secretly in the night. He knew of the miracles and that’s why he sought Jesus, but did not confess that Jesus was the Messiah and he was very slow to understand the message. Jesus treated him kindly, but they could not have a real friendship.

Jesus went to the Woman at the Well in broad daylight. She didn’t know who he was, nor about his teachings, followers and popularity, or miracles. She was a sinner. But she quickly knew who he was and did everything she could to follow him and to help others reach him. Jesus could truly have a friend in this Woman, and she in him.

The difference was their heart of hearts. The Woman most desperately wanted to be good and to love God. Perhaps it was not evident in her actions up until that point. She knew what she was doing when she committed adultery. This was all part of her mortal and weak state. She knew Jesus as the Messiah, and in her heart of hearts she was his friend, even if her mortality stopped her from fully manifesting it up to that point.

Nicodemus’ heart of hearts was different. I think it was still good, because he did come looking for Jesus and acknowledged in some part his goodness. Yet he was ashamed to be seen interacting with him, and his ways were so set that it made it difficult for him to understand the teachings of the Master. You would think that it would be easier to change him than to change a Woman who had slept with 6 different men. In this story we can see the importance of our heart of hearts.

And so, my message is that we should not be overly sad and disappointed in our failings.

David O McKay once said:

 “The greatest battles of life are fought out daily in the silent chambers of the soul.”

I know it to be true from personal experience that when we have won the battle in our heart of hearts, our battle is already won. The rest is simply of matter of time and patience. The question then is, what is in your heart of hearts?